Last night I watched the movie He's Just Not That Into You. The movie was supposed to be funny but I was blown away by how sad it actually was. It strikes me as bizarre how hard we have worked as women to get ahead and be respected only to have an entire generation of young women fall right back into the pattern of "if I don't have a relationship I am not whole". Through out the entire movie smart, motivated, accomplished women make complete (and sometimes obsessed) fools of themselves all for the sake of capturing that all elusive life partner! Even the main character GiGi who suffers one disastrous date and toxic "come on" after another pursues these loosers as if the are the last drink of water on the planet earth!  In the end GiGi finally captures the idiot who made it perfectly clear to her he was not interested in her and basically humiliated her when she physically flung herself on him! GiGi's love interest decided that he was "into her" so that made all the past crap O.K. and GiGi immediately fell into his arms because he wanted her! "Way to set the standard of abuse GiGi"!  What a pile of nonsense!! Did she ask herself at any point if she was still "into him"? Did it ever cross GiGi's mind as their lips were locked in that fabulous Hollywood smooch that this looser could decide next week that he made a mistake (he was just lonely, AKA horny) and break her heart all over again! If they wanted to actually make this movie a comedy GiGi should have kicked his fanny to the corner and told him to grow up that because she is as immature as him she only liked him last week! then GiGi could have tossed a toy at him just like the other emotionally under developed toddlers in the sandbox! Why is it that we keep letting  generations of women believe this nonsense? Perhaps that was the point of the whole sad movie! If I thought about my life from the time I was dating until right now I think the one thing I can say about relationships is they do not complete us (this is a big fat conspiracy that was started by "needy men folk" in order for us to believe we were lost without them!) We complete ourselves and sometimes it is many years and many relationships before this happens. How can women possibly expect a relationship to fulfill their every need when they are not completely sure what it is they actually need or want (sometimes we are ready for partner and sometimes we just need a "pleasant distraction") One of the characters in the movie was married to a complete dork (who was busy living out his personal fantasies by cheating on his wife with a completely self absorbed twit of a girl!)  When the dork tells his wife (in home depot, so she can't make a scene) that he has been cheating on her she makes a complete fool of herself by appearing at his office in sexy lingerie and seducing the undeserving sod. All the while his brain dead mistress hides in the closet (Come on!Grow up!) The mistress should have jumped out of the closet and the two women should have laid a beating on the cheating fool that Muhamed Ali would have been proud of! The only upside to this scenario is the mistress dumps him and eventually the pathetic wife catches on and dumps him to! The guy is such a dork that none of this really effects him and he just carries on his way as a "vacuous soul destroying troll"  Argh!! What is wrong with us, why does this drivel appear as entertainment? More importantly why is this supposed to be funny? Why as women with all our hard earned wisdom can we not tell other women the truth: If someone treats you badly or disrespects you, LEAVE THEM! Don't panic looking for a relationship until you know what you need. Never, never settle.  Most importantly no relationship completes you, the process is entirely personal and the only person who will ever complete you is you! Oh and last but not least don't think you can change someone you can not, they only become more like themselves!  Poor GiGi, Poor me for watching that annoyingly toxic movie! On a final note: Maybe it is called "falling in love" because sometimes it is like a tragic accident (oops she fell off a cliff!) Wouldn't it be better if we referred to it as "Finding Love" (on our own terms).